Thoughts On Turning 50

About this time last year, I started planning a cruise for my 50th birthday.  My friends and family seemed excited and told me they were "on board" (pun intended) for the experience.  But as the months passed, they  began bailing on me for various and mostly understandable reasons.  It was with mixed feelings that I officially cancelled the cruise following Michael's heart scare incident in Pittsburgh.  Truly, we didn't know at that point what his condition would be for a departure date of February 18.

Had so much not been going on at the time, I may have thrown a pity party for myself.  I didn't want to be selfish, but years of letting my mind go down perilous paths, I glanced toward the road of "if they really wanted to be with me on my 50th birthday, they would".  I mean, Jeff and Raul snapped their fingers and drew a large crowd for his birthday last year.  I guess I didn't have enough friends (or the right kind of friends) to be able to do that.  Poor me.

No offense to those who were still planning to go.  It would have been a great time, surrounded by a few friends and some of my family.  But it honestly would not have been the birthday I originally wanted to celebrate.  As it turns out, I got exactly what I wanted by staying right here in Kansas City!  Our friend Jack suggested a joint birthday party for me and Gerald in the "nest" at 75th Street Brewery.  It had been done before, but rather than plan nothing at all, I agreed to do it.

Little did I know it would be a catalyst for bringing all of my family together for the weekend.  It was absolutely the best gift I could ever receive!  Kate and her boyfriend, Pete, flew in Saturday morning and we spent the day with Michael and his mother.  Mom, Dad, Jay (plus surprise guest Adrian) and the Siegels arrived that evening.  Some experienced my debut as host for Downright Creepy's Remake/Rewind movie screening, but we all enjoyed brunch the next day and attended the party at 75th Street Brewery.

While that was all I could ask for my birthday, the icing on the cake (literally) was the theme for my 50th birthday.  Take a look at this beautiful cake!  While Barnabas Collins cried that he was turning 50, I cried in excitement as I opened my present.  Everyone chipped in to buy something I would never buy for myself, but would nevertheless enjoy for my next 50 years: the complete Dark Shadows series on DVD; yeah, that awesome set of 131 discs that comes in a giant coffin.

 

So how do I feel about turning 50?  Well, I feel like I've reached a true landmark, but not because of my age.  Instead, it's because I am perhaps the happiest I've ever been.  I've been with a loving partner for 14 years now (we celebrated our anniversary on the 19th) when I never conceived being with someone for more than 5 years!  I adore my job and, for the first time I can remember, am not even thinking about a different one!  (They seem to like me, too, and I feel truly appreciated.  I didn't think that was supposed to happen at work.)

Further, I actually have an outlet for writing!  The website has turned into more than a hobby for me and has given me great opportunities (for example, I'm going to Comic-Con again this year).  My brother thinks it's fantastic that I have something other than work in my life that I honestly enjoy doing.  I feel like I have more ahead of me and can go with it wherever I want.  (Jay and Adrian think I should become a local horror host, but I want to write a book.)

I was telling people that by turning 50 I was only "halfway there".  But that statement suggests that it's all downhill from there.  I do not feel like I am 50 years of physical age, so who's to say I'm not even halfway there yet?  No, I'm not as energetic as I have been in the past, nor is my mind the receptacle of memories that it used to be.  But I do feel like the future is wide open and full of possibilities.  In that sense, I've recently celebrated "just another birthday".

At the screening Saturday night, Tim announced to the audience that I was turning 50.  At first, I wished he hadn't said my age.  But afterwards, someone said, "You're not really 50, are you?"  "No," I said, "Tim was just giving me a hard time."  To which she replied, "I didn't think so.  You don't look anything like 50."  You know, the specific age doesn't really matter; it's the perspective on it.  I remember more traumatic birthdays on my 30th and 40th.  Maybe it's true that I'm not getting older; I'm getting better.

In any case, I can't wait to see what happens next...

With thanks to: Gene Owens, Karine Owens, Jill Siegel, Jeff Siegel, Brooklyn Siegel, Jay Owens, Adrian Castillo, Kate Owens, Pete Sahlberg, Michael Lendabarker, Mari Ann Lendabarker, Karen Hall, Jack Harris, Gerald Hughes, Jason Chaffee, Tim Canton, Eric Havens, Eric Kuhl, John Swan, Jeff Deutsch, Maria Leslie, Natalie Leroy, Cathy Weigel, and everyone who wished me a happy birthday on Facebook.

2012: The Year in Review Pt. 1 - Movies

At this time last year, I struggled to find enough movies to compile a "best of" list.  This year, I'm struggling to choose my favorites.  While there was only one "10", there were many more "9s" and "8s" that I truly enjoyed.  Therefore, I had to create some new categories to accomodate more than twice as many movies as 2011.  From top to bottom, please consider them the top 14 movies I saw in 2012...

Favorite Movie (Period) - Sound of My Voice.  I can't get this movie out of my head.  Without a doubt, the most thought-provoking movie of 2012.  Read my full review here.

Favorite Documentary - Comic-Con Episode IV: A Fan's Hope.  Yeah, I'm a geek, but this should be required viewing for everyone else.  Read my full review here.

Favorite Movie Leftover from 2011 - The Tree of Life.  When it was released, this was a very polarizing movie.  I found myself in the small camp of those who loved it.  If you don't worry about a narrative, the emotional experience is overpowering.

Favorite Movie Not from 2012 - The Loved Ones (2009). Very rarely does a horror movie come along that truly raises the bar.  It's various components may not be entirely original, but they are masterfully combined by director Sean Byrne into a gory, scary classic.

Favorite Superhero Movies (Tie) - Chronicle and The Avengers.  The Avengers is a no-brainer; nevertheless, you can read my full review here.  Chronicle, though, was equally effective on a fraction of the budget.  I particularly enjoyed how different sources of found footage were combined to seamlessly tell the story.

Favorite Animated Movie - Frankenweenie.  Of the three animated "horror" movies released this fall, this one best fit my sensibilities.  Read my full reviews of all of them here.

Favorite Discovered "Classic" - Twins of Evil (1971). I never expected to like this movie as much as I did.  It offers perhaps my favorite performance by Peter Cushing.  I wrote about in a feature about lesbian vampire movies based on Joseph Sheridan Le Fanu's "Carmilla"; read here.

Honorable Mention - The Perks of Being a Wallflower.  I didn't like this quite as much as any of the others, but it was darned close.  A touching "growing up" story, it takes place just a couple years past the time I was a teenager, so I related, but didn't completely connect.

Favorite Horror Movie - The Woman in Black.  2012 may have been a better year for movies, but not necessarily horror movies.  Therefore, this imperfect movie was still my favorite in the genre.  Read my full review here.

Favorite Movie I Really Wanted to Hate - The Hunger Games.  It reeked of Twilight, but was so much better.  Unfamiliar with the series of teen fiction books, what appeared to be a tamed-down version of Battle Royale was instead a fairly dark and adult thriller.

Favorite Comedy - 21 Jump Street.  Yeah, not a good year for comedies, but I surprisingly liked this one.  Just good, silly fun that made me laugh consistently.  For me, it also proved that Channing Tatum can be funny and I can actually like Jonah Hill.

Favorite Guilty Pleasure - Total Recall.  I don't really remember why I liked this one so much, but I nevertheless include it on my list.  I gave it an "8" when comparing it to the Schwarzeneggar original; read my full review here.

Movie I Absolutely Hated - This Means War.  Chalk up another one to Reese Witherspoon.  Not even the double-hunk-whammy of Tom Hardy and Chris Pine could save this excruciatingly awful movie.

Please keep in mind that I haven't seen everything that was technically released in 2012.  Therefore, there's no mention of Zero Dark Thirty or Hyde Park on Hudson, for example.  They may come up in future blogs about the Academy Awards, or even on next year's "Best Of" list as leftovers.

Overall, 2012 was a much better year for movies than 2011.  And it got even better at the end of the year.  Les Miserables came close to being my favorite movie; and, if there were enough musicals made to have a category, it would be the best.  Also, Lincoln was not what I expected.  Instead of a long, boring biopic, it was almost a thriller focusing on getting the Thirteenth Amendment passed before the end of the Civil War.  If I were writing about my favorite performances of 2012, these two movies would appear due to Anne Hathaway and Daniel Day Lewis.

For 2013, it's going to be a tough act to follow...